Oreo = Tool of Satan

Every time I eat Oreo cookies before bed, I have horrible nightmares. The dream I just had started with the old familiar “running from nuclear holocaust” bit, and was simultaneously happening to me and a movie I was watching on the scifi channel. Weirdly, they replaced all the scenes of graphic violence with pixelated video game graphics to beat back the censors. Then there was a giant, encroaching forest fire that we kept running into houses to get away from, but it turned into a giant lava flow, and right before I woke up, we were in a stadium running up the bleachers as people were being consumed by the lava, only right before the lava burned them up, they turned into 8-bit nintendo renderings. Of course I woke up right before the lava hit us at the top of the stadium. At that point, I remember telling myself I had to wake up, and then I did. Of course I am wide awake now, at 6:45AM on my day off.